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Jokes Thread


BoozyDave
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I thought I'd start up a jokes thread, if you like a joke just click the like button, I'd like to keep it to just jokes if possible :)
 
there might be some that are slightly bad taste or slightly offensive, but nothing too bad. if a joke offends you, tough :lol:
 

 

"Dad, can I have a Coke with my name on it?"

"Why don't you have a Pepsi, Max?"

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The big-titted blonde from next door lent over the garden fence earlier dressed in just a see-through negligee, and asked if I could pound her !Removed!.

I phoned my mate John from the animal rescue shelter, and he popped round.

He was there for three hours, and left with a big smile on his face, but no cat.

Strange

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I was shopping at Tesco and asked one of those wandering assistants,

"Excuse me mate, where can I find a pregnancy test?"

"No problem" he said, "they're right beside the condoms."

"Listen," I said, "if I knew where the condoms were I wouldn't need a pregnancy test."

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