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I will give £20 to the last person to post on this thread


Steve
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I like the thinking ;) 

Get rid of some more Audi drivers would be handy Audi A3's round my end it's like seeing Fords that many of them :D 

That's it I will not tolerate anymore language like that on here "Audi" you offend me with your potty mouth :)

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There is a man up here tho was jailed fir killing his wife and they reckon he put her body to his pals pig farm and what the pigs didn't eat the rest went thru the straw incinerator.. First man to be jailed for murder with out a body to prove it

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Good place for dog walk's then ;) 

less then a mile away from me think it was a lads torso was pulled out the river and an arm and the found other parts in Grimsby docks and the rest of it was found around Brigg if I remember 

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Note to self stay the fook away from Scottishtaffy and Gambits area's! As you might end up in a bacon sarney or next to fish and chips on a plate :)

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:lol::lol::lol aye touch my car, kids or wife ( in that order ) and................>_>:angry:

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a security company called my dad at his farm one night on the phone...../

caller... hello could i intrest you in home security?

dad...... no ive got that covered.

caller.,,,,, you can never have too much you know.

 dad.... no everythings locked up

caller.... what if they get past the locks?

dad...... they would have had to get past the 3 BIG !Removed! off dogs first

caller... errr i see but if they did?... you would still be better with an alarm.

dad... no if they get past all that then they have me to contend with

 caller.... i think you need better protection than just your self/

 dad..... not when i have 3 twelve bore shot guns, a 222 rifle and a long range 247 with telescopic sights

caller... errrr................ ummmmm.... ahem........ i can see your well covered then

dad... told ya good bye

 

my dads very old school. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Sounds like where I live :D 

My Missus uncle was telling me one night it was in the summer, he had his bedroom window open as it was so hot at 1.30am he could hear these voice at the side of the house talking about breaking in. So he went and got his 12 bore and blasted 2 rounds off into the tree in the garden said all he heard was the footsteps running off into the distance  :lol:

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  1. i did it one night when i was parked up in the lorry. heard a noise at about 3 am. peeked out the window and there was 3 little ' cherubs' trying to break in to my fuel tank. i carried a cash dead bolt gun. ( seperate story ) so i un screwed the end off it so it leaves a 1 in barrel, i put in a blank Shell. one of the high powder ones and quietly wound the window down a wee bit , stuck the barrel out the window and fired............. one !Removed! of a big BANG and a 1 Foot flame later  and these lads levitated about 3 ft off the ground and there little legs were running in mid air. and when they came back down 2 run straight into each other and the other ran into the lorry, probably blinded by the flash. by this time i could not see which way they ran as tears were rolling down my face. i did gain a hold all with 3 little jerry cans in it and a bit of hose and a few screwdrivers and pliers. i still smile at that to this day and that was around 10 yrs ago. true story. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:  got to win the 20 squid for that . surely.,  it will and dont call me shirley

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  1. i did it one night when i was parked up in the lorry. heard a noise at about 3 am. peeked out the window and there was 3 little ' cherubs' trying to break in to my fuel tank. i carried a cash dead bolt gun. ( seperate story ) so i un screwed the end off it so it leaves a 1 in barrel, i put in a blank shell. one of the high powder ones and quietly wound the window down a wee bit , stuck the barrel out the window and fired............. one !Removed! of a big BANG and a 1 Foot flame later  and these lads levitated about 3 ft off the ground and there little legs were running in mid air. and when they came back down 2 run straight into each other and the other ran into the lorry, probably blinded by the flash. by this time i could not see which way they ran as tears were rolling down my face. i did gain a hold all with 3 little jerry cans in it and a bit of hose and a few screwdrivers and pliers. i still smile at that to this day and that was around 10 yrs ago. true story. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:  got to win the 20 squid for that . surely.,  it will and dont call me shirley

 

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:   genuine - that is brilliant!!

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