BoozyDave

it's more common that people realise, it's to do with RF interference from the automatic door openers, some also use mobile phone signal blockers to stop people using their phones in the petrol station. some people get it in supermarket car parks (near the doors), but most people don't/can't park close enough for the interference to be an issue

Can't wait Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

Ooh, I think I like it now [emoji1] Will you be wearing that little black number again? Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

I know chris evans is a petrolhead, but, the show didn't get it's followers from normal reviews, it got publicity from clarkson being a outspoken and an idiot I won't watch it, but looking forward to the new clarkson show

don't like it

That's probably true. It's a session just for women, why should non Muslim women have to wear appropriate clothing? Will there be a woman's session with Christian appropriate clothing only? Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

hi welcome to the club

gutted you're selling it, someone will get a bargain B) If I was you, I'd try selling at £5k first, too cheap might put people off, or they might still want to knock you down on price

http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/584338/WaterWorld-Stoke-on-Trent-Muslim-Islam-waterpark-women-only-bikini-ban-clothing-veil-burqa

why isn't there a 'straight pride' march? and a flag designed to be flown by straight people just to let everybody else know how straight they are and they are 'straight friendly' also, when will the 'MOWO's' start? still playing on watchdogs, just got onto level 3

Rizmo, the sooner you start to mingle, the sooner you feel comfortable with us all. then you will see a newby and think 'I wonder why he's not mingling with everyone?' lol

My wife just said, "What do you want for Father's Day?" "A !Removed!" I replied. "Ha-ha, but what do you want from your daughter?" God I am sick to death of repeating myself to that woman.

I was working late at the Carphone Warehouse last night when I received this email from my 12 year old daughter: 'Dad,thespacebuttonisfaultyonthislaptop. Whenyougethomepleasegivemeanalternative.' I just walked out of work and eagerly rushed home, but I couldn't help but wonder... What the hell does 'ternative' mean?

Apparently double barreled names come about when both parents want to keep their own surnames, well, according to my friend Paddy Murphy-Murphy.

There are 400 billion birds in the world, 250,000 planes, but only one Superman. So, in answer to your question ... It's probably a bird.

For their re-opening, Alton Towers are looking for a name to reflect their new image. My suggestion of "Faulty Towers" was promptly rejected.

Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms AND kept the same tagline........... Sainsbury condoms - making life taste better Tesco condoms - every little helps Nike condoms - Just do it. Peugeot condoms - The ride of your life. Galaxy condoms - Why have rubber when you can have silk. KFC condoms - Finger Licking good. Minstrels condoms - melt in your mouth, not in your hands. Safeway condoms - Lightening the load. Abbey National condoms - because life is complicated enough. Halifax condoms - Always Giving You Extra Coca Cola condoms - The real thing. Ever Ready condoms - keep going and going. Pringles condoms - once you pop, you can't stop Burger king condoms - Home of the whopper Goodyear condoms - 'for a longer ride go wide' Muller light condoms - so much pleasure, but where's the pain. Royal Mail condoms - I saw this and thought of you. Andrex condoms - Soft, strong and very very long Renault condoms - size really does matter! Flash condoms - just sit back, relax and let flash do all the hard work Domestos condoms - gets right under the rim!!! Heineken condoms - reaches parts that others just cannot reach Carlsberg condoms - probably the best in the world Mars condoms - pleasure you can't measure AA condoms - for the 4th emergency service Pepperami condoms - It's a bit of an animal Polo condoms - the one with the hole!!! (VERY poor seller!!!) L'Oreal condoms - because your worth it! Mr Muscle condoms - love the jobs you hate

A new survey shows that 97% of the women who are in "open relationships" ... are totally unaware that they are in an open relationship.

People say I'm a 'marmite' sort of person. I used to think this was because you either love me or you hate me. Turns out it's because I'm black and I smell bad

I have a joke about insecurity, but I'm scared you wont like it

This morning on the way to work I drove into the back of a car, at some lights, whilst not really paying attention. The driver got out and he was a dwarf. He said, "I'm not happy." I replied, "Well, which one are you then?"

Women's first thought when coming across a skid mark in the toilet: "Eeww! That's horrible; I must get cleaning equipment before I can use this." Men's first thought when coming across a skid mark in the toilet: "Hmmm... Can I remove this with the contents of my bladder?"

These so-called 'foodbanks' are a total rip-off. I deposited some frozen meals at my local one last week, and when I went to take them out today they said they'd given them away to someone else. Unbelievable.

Say what you like about deaf people. But not blind people, they can still hear you.

Having watched Benefits Street, it's not much different to Sesame Street... Both have a big bird, a bloke living out of a bin and people trying to learn the alphabet.